The Open Door Church

     As I closed last Sunday’s sermon, I mentioned that parents are making a big mistake if they are not actively involved in helping their children choose their friends!  The verbal response to that statement revealed that I had struck a nerve with most of the adults in the audience.

     It might have been more accurate last week if I had said, “Parents are making a big mistake if they are not actively involved in helping their children choose their non-friends.”  By that statement I mean that there is a category of people that parents must identify and declare “off-limits” when it comes to their children choosing friends!

     The Bible calls those people “fools.”  God warns that if your children develop unhealthy relationships with “fools” they will be destroyed.  King Solomon wrote, “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed” (Proverbs 13:20, NKJV).

     In the Proverbs God identifies five kinds of “fools.”  By looking at the way the Scriptures describe each type of fool, we can avoid the destruction that results from companionship with them!  Today we will look at the first two types of fools: The Simple Fool and The Reactionary Fool.  Next week we will look at three additional types of fools: The Unreasonable Fool, The Scorning Fool, and The Committed Fool.

     Even the most casual student of Scripture is aware that from God’s perspective the discipline of children is essential.  He inspired Solomon to write such statements as:

• “Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives” (Proverbs 19:18, NLT).
•  “Folly [foolishness] is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far away” (Proverbs 22:15, NIV).
• “Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.  Punish them with the rod and save them from death” (Proverbs 23:13-14, NIV).

     The Biblical goal of child discipline is to gradually transform our children into adults who are able to function according to God’s design for their lives independently of their parents’ authority, yet totally submitted to God’s authority.  In other words, the system of discipline we set up in our homes should prepare our children for a godly life outside our homes.

     Failure to “discipline” a child sows the seeds of trouble, not only for the child, but also for the parents.  King Solomon wrote, “A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom, but a child left undisciplined disgraces its mother” (Proverbs 29:15, NIV).

     In fact, proper “discipline” of a child is an indication authentic parental “love.” God inspired Solomon to write, “Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them” (Proverbs 13:24, NLT).  Don’t tell me that you love your children if you don’t discipline them, because God says you don’t love them.  In fact He says you hate them!

     In an achievement-oriented culture like the one we live in, there is a tendency to equate the worth or significance of people with their ability to perform certain tasks.  Even Christians tend to determine one’s worth on the basis of accomplishment rather than on the basis of who he is in Christ.  As we mature in our faith, the Holy Spirit is constantly at work within us helping us realize that our worth is determined not by what we can do, but by who we are in Christ.  Paul explained this wonderful truth beautifully in his letter to the Ephesian believers:  “Because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.  And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus…Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and strangers, but fellow citizens with God’s people and also members of his household” (Ephesians 2:4-6…19, NIV).  Unconditional love is “great love.”

     God loved us—He placed supreme value upon us—“Even when we were dead in transgressions.”  It’s evident that God’s love is not conditional—dependent upon our ability to perform, our ability to be good!  He loved us when there was nothing good about us at all.  The same wonderful truth is echoed in Paul’s letter to the Romans.  He wrote, “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8, NIV).  God’s love is not dependent upon our performance…our behavior.

     Perhaps the most profound statement ever spoken that explains God’s unconditional love was uttered by Jesus when He said, “God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16, NIV).  Without any predetermined conditions, Jesus said, “God…loved the world!”

     Last week we learned from Scripture that the parenting style modeled by God includes the establishment of boundaries for our children—limits placed on behavior, statements of what can and cannot take place.  John echoed the same truth when he wrote, “Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlessness” (I John 3:4, NIV).  The word translated “lawlessness” literally means to “overstep a boundary.”

     Last week we also defined the Christian’s parenting objective: To produce responsible adults who are able to function independently of their parents’ authority, yet totally submitted to God’s authority!  As we concluded last week’s lesson, I said that as we study the boundaries God has established for His children, four principles surface that are important for parents to understand as we set up boundaries for our children—then I listed them for you:

• Boundaries should be clearly stated.
• Boundaries should include a reason for their enforcement.
• Boundaries should include an explanation of the consequences of violation.
• Boundaries should include an explanation of the rewards of obedience.

In this lesson we will look at each one of these in more detail.

     One of the greatest shortcomings in the parenting techniques of many parents today is the failure to set boundaries!  When I say boundaries, I am talking about rules—limits placed on behavior, statements of what can and cannot take place.  Without these boundaries, chaos breaks out in the family.  When there are no clearly defined rules, the result is frustration…and frustration eventually expresses itself in anger…and anger can turn to violence.

     When God did what He did in the verses we just read, He only had one kid—a son named Adam.  After He created Adam, the first thing He did was put him where He wanted him and told him what He wanted him to do.  Moses wrote, “The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it” (Genesis 2:15, NIV).

      The second thing God did was to set up his first boundary.  Moses wrote, “The LORD God commanded the man, ‘You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die’” (Genesis 2:16-17, NIV).  God is the model parent, and if He set boundaries as part of His parenting strategy, we can be sure it is the best way to parent!

     In keeping with our 2018 preaching theme of “Relevant Issues,” during last week’s sermon we looked at the Biblical answer to the question, “What happens when a person commits suicide?”  In this sermon I will continue to talk about the unpleasant issue of suicide.  I want to offer a Biblical answer to the question, “How can a person be set free from suicidal thoughts?”

     So let’s begin by looking at a statement made by Jesus.  He said to some Jews who had just become believers, “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32, NIV).  From this statement we can safely conclude that a person can be “set…free” from bondage to suicidal thoughts.  However, in order to do so he must learn “the truth” about suicidal thoughts.